Her Journey to Us

Ok… so first a word of warning 🙂 

I’m not overly graphic (I don’t think) but I am going to describe a birth… not a fairy tale! 🙂

If you don’t want to know about birth or crowning or fluids just read this part:

       “Baby Lydia arrived Saturday night, August 28th, at 9:35 pm and is beautiful and healthy. I feel great!!!! Everything went well”

If you want the whole story… read on….

I wasn’t originally planning on writing this but so many people have asked for the details on how things went so I figured this would be the easiest way to share with everyone who asked and anyone interested. We had a great experience so I’m more than happy to share what happened!

I’ll apologize now that it took so long to write…but I blame Lydia she’s just so captivating I can’t seem to pry myself away!

Friday 8/27 10:30 am-  I head into the birthing center for our 39 week, 1 day, check up. They did our first internal exam and she said my cervix was still posterior, hadn’t really started to move forward yet. I was barely 1 cm but I was showing good signs of effacement already. Her exact quote was, “Well, it won’t be tonight but you are ahead of the game!” Then she laughed and said it was really hard to tell when a woman would have a baby but everything looked good. She suggested I use Evening Primrose to help encourage effacement and we made an appointment for the next Thursday, 9/2, my actual due date.

I headed home and felt great…. Steve and I talked on the phone to try to figure out what it might mean… but I knew women who walked around at 3 cm’s dialted and it took weeks… so I wasn’t thinking anything about it. I kinda figured I’d be late because a lot of first time moms are and my mom was- and they say you often do what your mom does. So I just figured that I would enjoy every day as one of my last “me” days… that way each day was a little gift for me until my real gift arrived! lol

Friday night around 9 30 pm- We had dinner and settled in for the night with some TV. I was on the computer chatting when I felt liquid trickle down my leg. I asked Steve to pause it because something was going on…. he followed me into the bathroom. I was sure that it was not urine so we decided I should call the midwife. She asked if I was having contractions and I said I’d been crampy all day but nothing that I would have called a noticeable contraction. She said we had to find out if it was amniotic fluid or not (just a note- in Florida there is a law that once your water breaks you must be in active labor in the next 12 hours or you must be induced. They do this because they are afraid of infection. In other states the law is 24 hours…. it varies). So we needed to know if the clock was running or not.

By the time I was off the phone Steve already had our bags packed and in the car 🙂 We headed down. We hit EVERY single stop light on the way- quite frustrating to Steve. I found it funny and I tried to time these “cramps”…. they were less than a minute long and four minutes apart. But not very strong….

Our midwife, Crystal, was there and she checked me. She was shocked by how I’d progressed since that morning. I was a full centimeter but much more effaced and my cervix was in position. Plus the baby’s head was ready to go…. she said it was not amniotic fluid but a pre-pocket. In moving down the baby’s head had moved the fluid. She said that it meant that my water would break in the next 12-24 hours, prepare to have our baby in our arms in the next couple of days!

It was so exciting but so shocking… one minute you are prepared to wait and the next minute it’s happening!

She sent us home with instructions to take a bath/shower and try to get some sleep. We were to call her if any water broke (she sent us with little ph strips to test any liquid we had) and to check in the morning with her.

After updating family (that was fun and exciting!) I took a bath and went to bed. But it was hard to sleep because I was so excited. Steve said he jumped every time I moved all night. At 2 am there was another gush and the test came back as amniotic fluid. I was experiencing even less contractions that earlier though so she said to go back to sleep and to call her in the morning. We did, still no real contractions, but we needed to come in because we were on the clock now.

We arrived at 9:30 am and she checked me again. This time she was disappointed that I hadn’t made more progress. I was about the same. She suggested that because I was on the clock I try either an enema or castor oil to get things moving. (Another side note- she says in her experience castor oil never works really to bring on labor but if you are already in labor it can speed things up, but the side effect is it can also make you uncomfortable as it works and your contractions progress). She said the castor oil was most intense but most effective. I didn’t want to have to change locations or be induced more so I decided to go for it with the castor oil.

After that we unpacked our bags… put our candles in the labor/bedroom, put all of our food in the little kitchen we were allowed to use. Set up our DVD’s around the TV and got all ready. Steve joked it was like preparing to stay at a bed and breakfast for the weekend lol…. we had SO much stuff because we just didn’t know what all we might need.

My family was on their way to hang out in the waiting room and with us so we asked them to stop and get the castor oil for us. Crystal suggested that we mix it with Coca Cola… it’s thick so Steve stirred it while I drank it from a straw. It was nasty and thick…. I got it all down with only one minor little blip lol (sorry Steve) and she said to hang out and wait. She suggested we relax, have a massage, spend some time on the birth ball rocking (because it rocks the baby around on your cervix and encourages dialation), enjoy some food, spend time going up and down the stairs, and to go for walks (but not very far because of the castor oil kicking in).

So that’s what we did…. we watched Glee, I bounced and rolled on the ball, Steve took me out and had me going up and down the stairs which made me laugh, and we walked. I say walk but Crystal suggested vigorous marching walk so Steve was “step one two three” -ing me up and down the street. There is a beautiful on the water walk behind the center in Dunedin with these big beautiful houses and we marched there…. My family came, checked in, dropped off their stuff and went to lunch. They brought Steve and I back food… I was dying for lemon meringue pie. Which I thoroughly enjoyed (as the picture shows). Honestly it was fun…. and also during this we were keeping track of contractions. They were about 50 seconds or so in length and 2-3 minutes apart but were still so minor to me that I was talking through them and didn’t really notice any discomfort unless I was paying attention to them (another side note the website www.contractionmaster.com has a neat site to keep track of contractions and you can download an app for it too).

We even took a nap. Steve and I laid down in the bed and slept for about an hour or hour and a half. They started checking my blood pressure regularly because it got a little high. I attributed it to stress because of the stupid 2 30 time limit.

The castor oil kicked in but wasn’t too bad or too painful and seemed to get the contractions a bit more regular and moving.  It was close to 2 so we needed to make sure the contractions got close and regular to show I was fully in active labor.  I did squats, which I do not like and was not comfortable.  I did another vigorous walk but it was too hot to be outside long so I marched in circles around the birthing center and drank lots of liquids. They had me driinking a thing of labor enhancer and a think of Emergen C every half hour…. so basically I was drinking all the time lol.

 Around 3 she checked me and I was at 4 cm and at least 50% effaced. So progress!!  I was safe 🙂

Around 4 we picked out take out, I got to pick the restaurant. We decided on our orders and my family was going to go eat dinner and bring back things for Steve, Crystal and me.

I failed to mention that my midwife Crystal had recently announced her pregnancy, her first. She was 11 weeks along. We both had such similar first trimesters so it was so neat to talk to her about it… we craved the same foods so she was enjoying and sharing all the snacks we had brought with us too. She was wonderful.

While they were at dinner they said we should do a massage that would encourage contractions. They set up the room with all the candles lit and my relaxing music on and gave Steve instructions to massage a particular way on my belly. It was so wonderful because the massage felt good for me but allowed Steve to feel each contraction as they got stronger. So it was like we were experiencing it together… we talked and laughed through it. It was so nice to be going through it with someone…. the massage was working and the contractions were coming stronger and faster. As he massaged he could feel the muscles tightening and he could tell they were progressing as could I. Towards the end of the massage there were some that caught my breath. We were in business!

Steve got Crystal after a bit and she checked me…. 4 cm. Sigh.

6 or 6 30 ish- Crystal suggested I do some squats. Did I mention I hate squats? So I moaned and all but we agreed I’d use Steve for balance and do some squats. Well I only did one because when I went to the ground I felt a huge gush and water went everywhere. Steve went and got Crystal… she came in and announced that my water had broken. I was shocked because we thought it already had. She said she suspected because of my lack of progress that it hadn’t. It had merely sprung a leak, this was the real thing…. things should start progressing now.  This is also when my contractions got more intense and I kinda lost track of time. Steve and Crystal verified things for me though so it’s as accurate as I can make it.

My family came back and for a minute I thought I’d go out and eat with them. I thought I could sit on the birth ball and eat (so the contractions were stronger but not so bad) and then we’d see where we were. But the contractions had other ideas. They changed rapidly from nothing to “oh there is something there but not too bad” to “okay let me just take some deep breaths.” Still not horrible, but intense enough to stop you.

We started out laying on the bed with Steve rubbing my back…. I needed to start using some breathing techniques (another side note- I thought the Lamaze might be something that wasn’t helpful. I have had migraines my whole life so I have other pain management techniques. My mom said it helped her a lot so I thought it would be best to be prepared so she got us the DVD. We watched the DVD my mom bought us and the breathing and focal techniques were really good. Nothing crazy and dramatic like in the movie but one particular breathing exercise helped a lot). Between them I was still good. After a while I wasn’t comfortable and Steve suggested she check me again for progress.

4 cms still….

On the way back to the room I got sick and threw up in the bathroom. The contractions really kicked in there and seemed to have very little break between them. I really needed Steve then… I’d breath and he’d remind when to do a deeper breath which slowed me down (hard to explain but worked) and whenever he’d feel part of my body tense he’d stroke me and remind me to relax that muscle. The midwife’s suggestion…. if you keep your body relaxed your muscles aren’t tensed you feel less pain…. a tense muscle feels more pain than a relaxed one. Our muscles immediately contract for pain but if you can keep them relaxed you feel less pain. And it was true…. but you need to be reminded to do it lol.

Also, it’s not exactly pain. There were parts of it that were painful but mostly just a lot of pressure. The best way I could describe it is a lot of lower pressure- similar to when you have to use the restroom really bad but your entire lower abdomen.  And it forces you to focus…. my mind slowed down so that when I was given instructions I had to focus fully on what they were saying to respond. Everything slows down in your mind. My doula, Nashira, described it as you just turn inward. Which is true but I was also very focused on Steve. If he needed to get me something or get her we had to wait between contractions because I didn’t want to have one without him.

While we were in the bathroom the contractions were really strong. Crystal explained that I could not get in the water yet because there was a thunderstorm and she wouldn’t keep me out but she wanted to wait until I’d progressed to a certain point. A reward system 🙂 and to make sure I didn’t stall like I did earlier in the day.

But as I said these contractions were more intense. I got a little lost there. Steve said there were two contractions where he could see that there was panic in my eyes. It wasn’t that I was in pain. I did not wish I had drugs. I did not want to be anywhere else. I just wondered if there was more. I felt like 4 cms had been everything from bouncing around  and feeling great to feeling truly overwhelmed…. what would 8 cms feel like and how long would it take to get there? I wondered how long this would go on….

I told Steve and Crystal how I felt. Crystal explained that I’d probably be fast from there because I was fully effaced and not to pay attention to the dialation number. Steve reminded me to take one contraction at a time and I’d be in the water soon. He kept talking and reassuring me until I felt better.

Honest to God those 10 minutes were the worst of it… after that I was ok again. I NOW know that was transition. Transition is the hardest part of your labor because your body is making the big shift into high gear and it’s often accompanied by frustrated feelings of “Can I do this?” “Will this get worse?” “Etc” This is the period of labor when women yell at people or say nasty things because they just get a bit lost…. it had crossed my mind that it was why I felt worse but most people don’t have transition so early.

Turns out my body was doing some big changes….

I was so focused on getting in the water…. I knew that water made my head feel better and that was without being in the water so I wanted the water to make my body feel better. In my head I was very angry about the thunderstorm loll

Steve went in and said, “She needs to get in the water now.” So Crystal said I could get in the shower and she’d get the tub set up for later. Before I got in the shower she checked me….

4 cm…. it was now like 8 or 8:15.

Once the water hit I felt so much better…. like a million times better and I went back to just working through each contraction. I kept thinking of two things that different people said. One was “Each contraction is one closer to the baby”(Liz) and the other was “When you think you can’t do this you are almost done.” (my Mom)  And again it’s not exactly pain just intensity.

The first contraction hit in the shower and I stood up holding Steve. Afterwards I looked at him and said “Oh that’s so much better.” But then the next one hit and it wasn’t better. So I got down on all fours and he rubbed my back. Still not good so he suggested I lay down in the tub with a towel under my head. That contraction was intense and different and I told Steve something was different. The next one came and my whole body began to push.

This was the only other time I freaked a second because you always hear about the “urge” to push. There is nothing that it that is like an urge. An urge is the insistent feeling that perhaps, maybe, you want to push…. your body just pushes. Your whole lower body just goes. So I didn’t know if I should push, stop, breath deep or try to ignore it. I just told Steve, “I feel pushing” and he said “You feel the urge?” And I said, “No it’s just happening.”

He went and got Cystal who was trying to get Nashira, my doula, on the phone (she was supposed to be called in when I hit 6 cm).  She said I could move to the tub. I was SO excited. So we walked into the other bathroom where the big tub was. The water was too hot and still low because it hadn’t had time to fill because I was definitely ahead of schedule now. I got in the shower around 8:30 or 8:45 or so and was in the tub about 9 or 9 15.

Meanwhile Crystal was not ready. The birthing assistant hadn’t had a chance to arrive yet. My doula wasn’t there and I was already at pushing. When we went back for our 3 day check up she told me that I went form 4/6 cm to 10 cm and pushing in about 30-45 minutes. She also said that it is not like I cut down the tradition 4-12 hours of delivery time to 30 minutes I merely condensed it. She said that I experienced everything the other woman does but mine was jammed closer together. Usually women do that part slower and are more comfortably and have longer breaks between contractions and they build slower. Mine went from 0-60 or something. She also told us later that she knows a woman who had both kinds of labor… one traditional and one like mine. She said that she preferred the longer one because it was a more gradual, less intense, process.  Me, I’ve always been a band-aid ripper and was quite happy that we did it quickly, even if it was more intense.

So I couldn’t get in the water because it was way too hot. Steve turned the water cooler and tried to move it around for me so I could get in. As the next contraction hit I just went ahead and got in…. the water wasn’t full at all and Steve was in the process of getting in. It all happened so fast he couldn’t even get in the husband seat. He was supposed to be able to sit on a ledge behind me with his legs on either side and support me and massage me.  But as he was getting in I leaned back on his leg and had a contraction. From that point on I didn’t want him to move. It was funny because during contractions instead of the slow focal thought process I had before I was thinking lots of stuff. One of which was “Why is Steve not getting in the tub with me? Is it because he didn’t have time to put on his swimtrunks?”

Anyway my family said they could hear Crystal running around back there. She popped into their room, smiled and said, “Everything is ok!” and disappeared.

On my second contraction in the tub I looked at Crystal who was still running around and said, “Can I push now?” She told me I could and Steve held my hand and stroked my hair and I did. I thought in my mind “Oh this could take 30 minutes or 2 hours.” I’ve heard stories of women pushing for hours. The contractions were distinctly different than the ones before…. between contractions I now felt very calm and no pressure at all. I read that your body does this so you can gather thoughts and strength for the pushing. After I pushed I felt like something was different so I reached down and felt the baby’s head. I told Crystal and I remember her saying, “Really?” She was still gathering her things together… the birth assistant and Nashira, our doula, had not arrived yet.

She came to the edge of the tub. I was on my knees in the water. Originally I wasn’t sure if I wanted a water birth or not, I thought that I might want to labor in the tub and get out for the pushing part. But at this point I didn’t really have a choice, it was all too fast. Also, I don’t think anyone would have gotten me out of that tub for a million dollars I was so much more comfortable there.

Crystal told me the next one would crown the baby. I pushed and I could feel her there…. I’ve heard it described as the Ring of Fire but honestly the water most definitely diffuses that. A lot of pressure and feeling tightness/stretching but ok. I didn’t look because I was trying to focus on not tensing and staying relaxed so I leaned my head back on Steve. Steve held me and I heard laughter in his voice when he said, “Our baby has SO much black hair!”He knew I’d been hoping the baby would have hair. Crystal told me the next push would be it, then shoulders and then done. I laid back on Steve and tried to relax and waited for the next contraction. When it hit I pushed and I could feel Cyrstals hands down there…. I knew something was different but I didn’t know what. Suddenly I felt her free and heard her cry and Steve gasp. We skipped shoulders and in Steve’s words she “shot out like a torpedo!” lol

The movements I had felt were Crystal freeing Lydia’s hand. She had her hand up by her face and if she’d just let me push her arm could have been hurt and she would have done me some more damage too so Crystal had to adjust that.

They put her on me and wrapped a blanket around us. She cried and Steve laughed. I laughed. All of the pressure was gone and I just felt euphoric… similar to the rush when I jumped out of a plane years ago. Just high.

We checked to see if she was a boy or a girl and I just laughed and said “I knew it!”

Steve was stroking my hair and we were both just talking to her. She was so alert and looking at us…. it was amazing.

My mom said in the waiting room they could hear Crystal running back and forth, they heard me make one sound when I pushed the hardest (she said like a relief kind of exhale/exertion), Lydia cry and then Steve laugh. She asked if she could come back so she was with us while we examined her and for the aferbirth. I had decided at one point that I wanted her to come back to be with us… but things happened so fast and I was so internally focused I failed to tell anyone to bring her back. I wish I had.

Nashira arrived as Lydia was crowning and the birth assistant missed the whole thing entirely!

Crystal hit the drain on the tub and left us to see our baby. After a bit she checked us both out, Steve cut the cord and I delivered the afterbirth. Which is nothing but feels SO good when it’s done. Steve took Lydia and had some Daddy time before taking her out to meet the family.

I remember Crystal telling me I did a good job and I laughed and said, “oh you say that to all the moms!”

I just felt so good and was breathing hard like I just ran a marathon.

They got me out of the tub and cleaned off and in bed. Then Steve brought her back to me. I’m so glad he got to go out and present her to everyone 🙂

A note on mess…. one of the reasons I thought I didn’t want to do a water birth was I didn’t want to be in the tub with all the fluids and mess. But really what comes with the baby is pretty minimal and it’s diffused in the tub. One of the midwives had told me it was actually less mess than doing it out of the tub. I do know that the messy part was afterwards but by then the water is gone and they get you right out of there so you aren’t “in” any mess.

I had just a few stitches because of Lydia’s hand on her face. Crystal said if she hadn’t done that I probably wouldn’t have needed them at all. She also warned me that someday when we have another baby it will be even faster and probably just 2 or 3 pushes and be done. She said next time to make sure I paid attention to my body.

Steve and I discussed that if we hadn’t had the early morning leakage I wouldn’t have known I was in labor. I would have hung out at the house, he would have done the house/yard work he was planning. I would have realized around 5 or 6 that something was up but after timing the contractions and all we wouldn’t have headed in until later. My water might have broken in the car (poor Steve). I would have had those transitional difficult contractions while we were driving and Steve couldn’t have coached me as easily. And IF we had made the center I don’t know if I would have been able to get in the tub or anything. It would have been crazy… we were so lucky things turned out the way they did.

It was just perfect for us.

And that’s the bottom line. I’ve had some people comment or question why we did things this way. I think every woman is unique and needs to decide what is best for her and her baby. If we had been high risk I wouldn’t have done it this way. I have always been “half-hippie” as Steve says. I like things the old fashioned way. Hospitals and doctors and needles make me nervous and uncomfortable. I never would have been able to relax in that environment. This was perfect for us.

Steve said he was really happy with how things were. As a couple the focus was on us. Crystal was there guiding and advising us but let us go through this together… which was a wonderful thing for both of us.

We were also very lucky that things went the way we wanted. Often complications arise and the bottom line is getting your baby to you safe and sound. We had it set up that if something went wrong we’d head to the hospital immediately. My priority was a healthy and happy baby…. we were lucky that there were no complications and (besides being very fast) things went according to plan 🙂

I loved the freedom to move around and feel unhindered. I don’t do well being confined or told what to do. I felt fully involved in all decisions. I knew it wasn’t going to be the most physically comfortable day of my life but I also knew it was the most rewarding.

Which is true.

Would I do it again? …. absolutely! Would I do it the same way?….. definitely!

So there you go 🙂

Lydia was born at 9:35 pm  7 pounds, 5 ounces and 22 inches long

Lydia Hannah Lee Derry

I tried to remember who wanted to be tagged…. hope I got who asked me to do it, if not it’s open for reading 🙂

If I left anything out or anyone has questions I’m happy to answer. Lydia is beautiful and I am one very lucky and happy girl!

PS…. the most uncomfortable I was in the whole process was when I was flat on my back on the exam table being checked out. So all you women who gave birth on your backs… you are my heroes!!!!

PSS We were allowed to take Lydia home the same night. We had to breastfeed, I had to eat, shower and use the restroom before being allowed to leave. Lydia was checked out but we had to have her checked by a pediatrician with 24 hours (which we already had set up to do). We got home around 2 30 am…. and went to sleep in our own beds. Which was very nice 🙂 Although we were up every few minutes checking on her lol

ahh parenthood!

Right afterwards….

 

 

My beautiful family!

 

About one hour old!

 

So tiring being born!

 

One day old

 

tiny feet

 

  

Donna Hale Arsenault, Erin Atheney, Theresa Hohmann and 4 others like this.

• 
  Elizabeth Conway Hooper
  Very nice, Angel! I’m so glad you were able to do it the way YOU wanted to!!! 🙂 Some women take 2 hours to push? Damn…I am glad I never heard that statistic before I had Saara…she was out in like 2 or 3 pushes total! And like you,… my midwife ALMOST didn’t make it either! I’m so happy for you guys!!! I wish I could use a birth center like the one you were at…but oh well…c’est la vie!

  I’m just really shocked that they made you wait to get into the water, because when I had Saara, I was in the water very early because it helped make labor more comfortable. I remember I had also dilated to about 4 cm pretty painlessly, then I was in the water until I was about 8cm when i started throwing up, and that’s when the “OMG can I do this?” stage hit…LOL…but I was too busy focusing on puking to think about anything else! Then just at the time I thought I couldn’t handle it anymore, it was time for her to come! Crossing fingers I can do it all-natural with the twins too…I am asking my OB about it on Thursday!

  Hard to believe how fast the time flies, isn’t it? Seems like only yesterday you found out you were pregnant, and then I found out a few months later…now look! You have your baby and my twins are 2 days away from being at the point of viability! Anyway…you did good! 🙂 Enjoy every second with your beautiful baby…we’ll come see as soon as we can! (Oh, and don’t let ANYONE try to make ANYTHING negative about any of this…you did a wonderful job!) 😉See more

  06 September 2010 at 20:31 ·LikeUnlike

 

Angel Lee

Thanks Liz! 🙂

It is scary how fast the time goes! lol It does seem like just yesterday we found out she was coming and here she is! And I distinctly remember when you were texting me the pic of your pregnancy test because I got it as I was …leaving one of my midwife appointments 🙂

I think the biggest thing that kept me out of the tub was the thunderstorm and the safety concerns with that. A side note was probably that I would stall or slow again because I’d done that when we went home the night before and in the daytime… but it all worked out.
All of Crystal and Nashira’s suggestions worked out very well to keep me comfortable.
And Steve was amazing… on our way in we’d gone over all of our “game plan” and he kept me right on track and reminded me of everything we’d talked about. He was a great coach!

Thank you…. even if it had all gone wrong it would have been worth it to get our little miracle…but I’m SO glad it went the way it did! 🙂 She’s totally worth it!
See more

06 September 2010 at 20:48 ·LikeUnlike

Angel Lee Oh and Liz I don’t know if you want to tag the other girls… if that works. Or I can accept them as friends so they can read this. Whatever works! I definitely wanted to share with them… especially Alexa (couldn’t remember name for sure) who is due next!

06 September 2010 at 20:49 ·LikeUnlike

Erin Atheney I love your story…Glad I got to read it and hear it first hand though!! 😉
I know Annmarie wanted to hear all about it, you should tag her… ♥ ♥ ♥ and I want to come see you guys before I leave.

06 September 2010 at 21:14 ·LikeUnlike

Vicky Jones I wish we could have done it that way years ago. We had very little choice. I had no drugs….but every doctor in the hospital was there with needles and moniters. I am so proud of both you and Steve….and I am in love with my little grand baby.

06 September 2010 at 21:30 ·UnlikeLike · 1 personLoading…

Elizabeth Conway Hooper I can’t tag people on your note, but I know Alix was wondering about you. Maybe if you get a chance just jump over there and post a quickie status update or something? Or else send her a request…Alexandra Hoffman is her name. 🙂 She’s pretty convinced that she’s going to be late…Cooper is due in one week!

06 September 2010 at 21:51 ·LikeUnlike

Heather Gallup This is beautiful, Angel! What am absolute blessing!

06 September 2010 at 22:02 ·LikeUnlike

Angel Lee

Mom- You are a champ! Clinton and I were both huge and late and you did it all on a surgical table with no midwife/doula support 🙂 I can’t imagine, like I said I was most uncomfortable on that cushy table. I love you 🙂

Liz- I was convince…d I would be late too!
I’ll find her and request her 🙂

Erin- We want to see you again too! ♥

Heather- it was a blessing! She would have been a blessing no matter how she arrived but everything was wonderful for us 🙂See more

06 September 2010 at 22:33 ·LikeUnlike

Alexa Nigro Thank you so much for sharing this. Very insightful and beautiful. [And a great help to me 😉 ] Congratulations to you and your new family!

06 September 2010 at 23:19 ·UnlikeLike · 1 personLoading…

Tanya Navé

I am so glad everything worked out so well for you and Lydia! I am truly proud of you new momma 😉 Now the fun begins…birth is the easy part hahaha! I saw your new pics…and don’t worry about the # of pics you can NEVER have enough. … M is tired of the camera in his face. I was never a big picture person…but I am now! Enjoy this time you have one on one with her…it goes by tooooooooo tooooooooo fast! They grow/change so much their first year. Fred said that we just have to savor every minute and not live for “when he crawls, when he walks, when he talks” because we will never get this time back! It’s very true…I tried to remember this. It is so amazing to see them learn. Enjoy momma and if you have any questions feel free to ask! Can wait to meet her in JanuarySee more

07 September 2010 at 03:34 ·UnlikeLike · 1 personLoading…

Tanya Navé Up for your 3am feeding huh? 😉

07 September 2010 at 03:50 ·LikeUnlike

Angel Lee lol yup
needed a minute to get sleepy again 🙂

07 September 2010 at 03:51 ·LikeUnlike

Erika Gustafson Bredeson Great story!! I’m so glad all turned out just the way you wanted it..since both of my births were not the amazing days I felt they should have been, it’s definatly inspiring! Hope I get to meet her someday soon 🙂

07 September 2010 at 14:11 ·LikeUnlike

Suzanne Donzero CONGRATS!!! Your family is ADORABLE!!! Can’t wait to see that little cutie-pie!!!

07 September 2010 at 18:52 ·LikeUnlike

Angel Lee She can’t wait to meet you guys too!

08 September 2010 at 22:55 ·LikeUnlike

What I’ll miss and what I won’t

Things I will miss about being pregnant

– Knowing exactly where Baby is and what he/she is up to and that they are safe 🙂

– Having significantly less migraines and less severe migraines when they do come.

– Being able to eat whatever I want (as long as it’s not bad for Baby) without calorie guilt.

– Not feeling guilty for taking a nap or pampering myself a bit.

– Seeing the scale numbers rise and knowing it means something good.

– Everyone being so very nice when you are pregnant… strangers smile at you, people offer to help, everyone cares.

– My hair and skin looking so fantastic!

– Drawstring and elastic pants!

Things I will not miss about being pregnant

– The funny little dance I have to do to get into my pants.

– Not being able to pick things up when I want them moved, so I have to ask for help.

– Having to be so very careful about what I eat… sushi 😦

– Sleeping on my stomach…. sigh. I love sleeping on my stomach!

-Everyone feeling the need to tell me scary labor stories.

Surprisingly I’ve enjoyed being pregnant. Perhaps, it’s because I have had an excellent pregnancy. Everyone keeps asking, “Are you ready to finally be done with this?”

Well, the answer is of course I’m ready to finally hold my baby in my arms. But as for being desperate for being done with pregnancy I don’t feel that. I don’t feel bad.

I want my baby to arrive … because I’m excited, not because I’m uncomfortable. I’m trying to take the perspective that I can’t wait for Baby but that every day that he/she doesn’t arrive is one more day I can enjoy on my own. I know that it will be a long, long time before I have days in which I get to completely decide how my day will go. My world will no longer be just about Steve and I so I’m trying to enjoy each day as it comes.

But I can’t wait 🙂

 38 weeks 3 days

exactly 39 weeks!

Sweet Dreams little one

Nursery is all done!

Can’t wait to put our baby in here… we’re both so happy with how it turned out… the room is very relaxing and peaceful and just feels so full of promise and hope 🙂

This is our little changing station… ever since we moved in Mom has referred to this as the changing table… and it is a perfect set up. The bathroom is immediately to the left and we have the diaper genie all set up there. We made sure to have a little bag that holds diapers, wipes and powder so if we decide to change elsewhere we can just scoop up the bag and travel 🙂

On his or her door a nail waits for the letter of his/her name. Steve and I painted them. I painted the L and P for a girl and he painted the G for a boy.

Inside the room….

I like to think it’s warm and comfortable… cozy and clean. The theme officially is meadow… a combination of turtles, songbird and trees. There are lots of details that mean things to us…let me start from one corner of the room and go around.

The back of the door has chalkboard clouds that currently say “Steve+Angel = Baby”, someday Baby can write on these and play. We also have a white board/magnetic board that says “Welcome Home Baby, We love you- Mommy and Daddy” Soon we can write his/her name there.

Next is an adorable little turtle that Debbie painted for us 🙂 I love him!

Following the room around finds the crib and our tree. We knew we wanted a tree… we started off with the idea that we wanted a simple graphic tree but then mom started painting and we loved this one. It’s somewhat cartoony and whimsical and perfect. The bird took some debate. As mom will glee-filly tell you there originally was another bird there… more of a pheasant or a partridge. I had pictured more of a songbird so after a lot of angst the partridge was painted over and we got our little bluebird. I hated asking mom to paint over original bird, hence her glee and the story of the murdered partridge. But I love how it looks 🙂

The bedding is beautiful and so sweet and all of the little stuffed animals await 🙂

Next we have the china cabinent which has been a huge source of debate. Steve isn’t sure he likes it. I like it very much for a baby and for a little girl. I think if we have a little boy it may have to go eventually. What neither of us like is it takes up so much space. But I do like the storage.  Now it has books, baby’s first piggie bank, toys and pictures of family inside 🙂

Next Baby’s toy hammock filled with new and old. The giant Bee is the first stuffed animal I bought Baby 🙂

Next the couch. Some people have told us we are genius for having it there… it will be great to sleep on etc. Others have told us it’s ridiculous because it doesn’t rock. We’ll see. Ideally we’d love to have both it and a rocker/glider but there isn’t room. We figure right now the couch is comfortable and we like it. We are still trying where to put a rocker/glider in the house. Nana has kindly offered to give us hers… we can’t figure out a place yet.

Over the couch is the first line from Songbird by Eva Cassidy. It’s Steve’s and my song and part of the inspiration for the room. I love how perfect the song is for Baby. Grace was wonderful enough to paint it up there since a. I am too pregnant to safely climb and b. I wouldn’t trust my handwriting! It looks perfect!

Next we have our little tree…. I found bumble bee lights and strung them up there. We have them on a timer and they glow in the evening. We also have a little turtle that projects stars on the sky. The little wagon was a gift from a friend and it’s so full of toys… none of which we bought. We’ve been so blessed by friends and hand me downs.

And a closet full of clothes…. mostly gender neutral. We have a few boy outfits and a few girl outfits that we got from consignment sales or that hopeful friends or family got us 🙂

And I love this… my mother painted it when she was pregnant with me 🙂 It’s very true

There are other little touches like a frame with Baby’s ultra sound picture and the bears given to us for our wedding. Baby has my Lamb doll which was the first thing my Mother bought when she was pregnant for me and one of my favorite toys growing up. There are so many things I can’t wait to share with him/her! And I so hope he/she likes the room. I do the typical mother thing and spend a lot of time just sitting in there waiting. The room is so full of hope and joy. I love that I find Steve in there too, just relaxing and soaking up the atmosphere we’ve created!!

When baby first arrives he/she will be sleeping in our room in this bassinet. The bassinet is special because it is the one that Clinton and I both slept in as babies. I just can’t wait to lay our baby here!

 Lots of friends waiting….

Also very special is this cradle. My Poppop made it for my mother when she was expecting me. My brother and I both slept here…. Another thing I can’t wait to see Baby in.

We have clothes that belonged to both Steve and I. Baby has my coming home outfit and the blanket that wrapped Steve up on the way home from the hospital. There are so many memories… and I can’t wait to make fresh ones!

We are good to go!

37 weeks! whoo hoo!

I’m very excited for this week because it means Baby can technically be considered full term. If they came from now on out we wouldn’t have to worry about their health and safety, they would most likely be perfectly healthy and fine… AND I wouldn’t have to go to a hospital for delivery. I’m safe to head straight to the birth center in case baby comes.

They are still happy with progress at the center. I’ve lost two pounds which they said sometimes happens to moms in the 9th month. For a minute they started to freak out about my weight but I reminded them that I lost and regained 10 pounds in the beginning…. so they aren’t worried.

The midwife thinks the baby probably currently weighs around 5-6 pounds and will be around 6.5-7.5 when they are born… but she says weight is very hard to guess.

She did accidentally keep saying “she has a strong heart.” Then she caught herself and said it was funny because she usually calls all babies “he” so maybe it’s a sign she says… she never guesses but she’s going to go with girl because it’s so unusual for her to slip that way.

They said I’m right on track and gave me something called Labor Enhancer to take a few days a week in preparation of the big show. It makes me have a about a half hour or so of Braxton Hicks… she says it’s like doing reps for your uterus lol. My doula, Nashira,  has also given me Red Raspberry Leaf tea for toning so I should have a very toned, fit uterus for the big day!

I just started having some swelling on my ankles and fingers and they said it could be because I was a bit dehydrated yesterday… nothing to worry about, just keep an eye on it.

The last visit we had the student midwife was there… we hadn’t seen her since my 16 week appointment. She got all excited because it was the youngest baby she had worked with and she found the heartbeat. Baby did run away from her but it was the last time Baby had run fromsomeone looking for their heartbeat. What was funny was she was remembering that story when she went to look for the heartbeat again… I said that Baby had been well behaved and had not run away since then… as soon as I said that the baby took off and made her chase him/her around. We have a baby with a sense of humor for sure! lol

The Baby is also messing with me because I know movement is supposed to slow down as we get close to the big day as Baby drops and he/she runs out of room but we’ll be active and average and then just stop the next day… no gradual slowing down. So I got worried and called the midwife… she said I just needed to make sure I was getting at least 10 movements by morning and 10 in the afternoon and 10 in the evening. We are definitely getting that but Baby still seems to have an average active day then a very quiet day and then back and forth…. keeps throwing me off! Steve just gets excited figuring it means we are that much closer to the day….

So for now we better just finish packing our bag and wait! 🙂

Dreams of Baby

When I found out I was pregnant a lot of friends warned me that I would get anxiety dreams about being pregnant. The websites warned that I would dream of giving birth to various animals or under strange conditions. So I expected a lot of dreams where I dropped or lost the baby or gave birth to a litter of puppies or something. But I did not have any of those dreams.

But I did have some….

The first I had was just a week or so after we knew we were expecting. In my dream Steve left me or rather was going to leave me. I begged and cried and pleaded with him not to leave the Baby and me… so he decided to do the right thing and stay, but he was clearly miserable. In the dream later on I was very pregnant and he had died and I felt all this guilt and sadness. I woke up so relieved that it was a dream that I hugged him and apparently was digging my nails into his back and he woke up to reassure me that this was silliness (which I knew) and he wasn’t going anywhere. That was the only “anxiety” type dream I had.

All the rest were various dreams of already having baby to giving birth… none of them bad.

I dreampt that I was holding my baby and trying to breastfeed but suddenly realized we didn’t have a pump or storage and I felt sad.

I dreampt that I started early labor and went back to sleep… woke up again at 6 am and told Steve it was time to go. For some reason we had to go to a hospital where they kept discussing my heart, which was weird. I was 8 centimeters by the time we got there. In that dream I woke up later (missed the birth) and Steve was holding our red haired daughter. The director of the hospital came in to see the beautiful baby and Clinton had already taken 100’s of pictures of little Penelope in various outfits with different backgrounds and poses.

I had one dream that we had a little boy playing… but it was the most vague dream.

I had another that we had our daughter, a dark haired little girl, who was about 2 in the dream and wanted a red velvet Santa style dress at TJ Max lol. She was running around laughing.

I had one where I went into labor on August 15th… and I was nervous because it was early. The midwife said to come on in but we said we’d have to wait because we hadn’t packed our bag. I remember being worried that we didn’t have clothes to fit a baby coming two weeks early so we packed the softest blanket we could find in case we had to wrap them in that.  Baby came and was a little girl.

The most realistic and recent one was that we were in the bed at the birth center… it was very realistic and detailed. I remember the baby came and they held it up to me and wrapped a blanket around the baby. I reached out and pulled the baby to me, Steve was behind me and we were just marveling. Suddenly Steve said, “We didn’t even check if it’s a boy or girl!”  We laughed and unwrapped the baby and there she was… a Penelope again.  What was most interesting about that dream is that the very next night at our birth class the teacher told us that couples that wait to find out are often so excited to see the baby period that they forget to check gender… which is exactly what we had done.

Of course I’ve read that if you dream girl it means the baby is a boy and vice versa… we’ll see 🙂

I love Daddy

Well in the ongoing debate concerning is Baby boy or is Baby girl I think I can verify one thing for sure… Baby loves Daddy!

Most of the time if baby is kicking up a storm and I tell someone, “Baby is kicking. Feel here.” Baby will go instantly quiet and stop the show. I can’t figure out if this is just being contrary or if it’s because Baby likes the attention…. the Baby book says that they can feel the touch and respond. So it’s either fear (which I don’t think it is) or just soaking it up.

But for Daddy we dance! I already wrote about how Baby has Daddy time… well we’ve taken it to a whole new level. I was on the couch and Steve put his head in my lap, his cheek against my belly, to doze and nap…. my whole belly shifted from one side to the other as Baby decided he/she had to be on the side that Daddy was on. Then the pats and kicks started till we were properly aimed at Daddy’s mouth… lol Steve had to laugh because the Baby would not let him sleep.

So just as an experiment he moved to the other side of my belly… sure enough we watched the whole belly swing back to the other side and the pats adjusted to get Daddy!

I think it’s so amazing that the Baby already knows, and loves, Daddy!

The responses I have been getting is that if Baby starts to go nuts and I sing softly to him/her we quiet down….. I can tap my fingers across my belly and get a response but most amusingly I’ve already irritated my child. The Baby gets way up under my right rib and presses on something, possibly my gall bladder, and it hurts all the way through my back. My only real painful symptom. So I will take my hand and gently push Baby off that spot.

Sometimes, since Baby is stubborn, I have to leave my hand there… but the other night when I did it I felt a distinct push back followed by a kick. As if to say, “Mom leave me alone!” I had to laugh… Baby has definitely lived up to the nickname Thumper 🙂

What do you think? Boy or Girl

So there is already one blog on here about some of the signs for Baby to turn out to be a boy or a girl….

In a day or two there will be an update with some new informatin we have…. but here is your location for officially placing your vote on if Baby will turn out to be a little boy or a little girl… I would love it if you put your reasoning in the comments! And if you want credit for being right (bragging rights and all) you should put your answer in the comment with your name 🙂

Pink or Blue? Part 2

So I know we could just go to the safe and look at what she wrote down for the Baby’s gender… but at this point with no more possible sonograms I wouldn’t trust it. IF we were going to find out I would have wanted to check more often to be sure!

Now it’s just guessing and waiting… but I’m enjoying the guessing. So I put a list of some of the “signs” that I’ve found or noticed about the baby… here is an update 🙂

–If your baby is low and all out in front, then you are having a boy. If you carry your baby higher and you got wider with the pregnancy, then you are having a girl.

Neutral- Baby is high and mostly in the front so this one doesn’t help either way… because the results are half and half. 

The ring test is a very common baby gender predictor. You hang your wedding band on a string of your hair, or on a string. Have someone stand over you and hold the ring directly over your belly. If the ring moves in a circle you are having a girl and if the ring sways back and forth you are having a boy.

Neutral– We tried this one but Steve either managed to be really still and the ring didn’t move much at all or he could tell it was only moving because of the way he was moving…. so we couldn’t get anything on this one.

The rate of the baby’s heartbeat is also supposed to let you know. I have heard that this is one of the myths about baby gender prediction that often provides to be true. If the baby’s heart rate is faster than 140 beats per minute, then you are sure to have a girl. If the average heart rate is below 140 beats per minute, it is said to be a boy.

Girl– The heartbeat has never been below 140… usually in the 150’s. So Girl.

If you have morning sickness that seems to last all day long and last for longer than your first trimester, then you are having a girl.

Boy– I wasn’t sick at all… just a week or too of ickiness.

I found some that say supposed indicators of a girl are: round face, acne breakouts, the woman looks worse pregnant than she did when not pregnant, and her chest grows dramatically.

Boy– my face hasn’t changed, I’ve had very few breakouts and my chest did not grow that dramatically.

But I also found that some supposed indicators that the baby will be a boy are: hair grows faster on the legs, her nose widens, feet are colder during pregnancy, and you have not had a dramatic growth spurt in the chest area.

Girl– So since none of these are true either I guess that means the opposite.

I found this quiz online that asked questions and the results were 60% in favor of Girl. But it really came down to the a question I couldn’t answer because I hadn’t noticed.

They asked if Baby was high- Yes (Girl), 2. Baby heartbeat is over 140 bpm (Girl) 3. Cravings are sweet (Girl) 4. No morning sickness (Boy) 5. My belly looks like a basketball (Boy) 6. Weight is all in the front (Boy) 7. no acne (Boy) 8. My feet are the same (Girl) 9. they asked if hair was growing faster or slower  but I haven’t noticed so they said the same meant (Girl) 10. they asked if urine was dull or brightly colored. I haven’t noticed and when I tried to notice I am not seeing a difference from before and I don’t now what qualifies as dull or bright….

So that means that quiz either ties us at 5 and 5 or 6 and 4 LOL

The Chinese gender predictor on the Pregnancy site and another site both say that Baby will be a Girl. But another Chinese gender predictor says boy… but I’m going with the majority.

We heard a lot about the reliability of the Drano Crystal test…. we did this last weekend to ambiguous results. The instructions we used said to add urine to the Drano crystals, wait for the chemical reaction to end and then check the color. The chemical reaction seemed to last far more than the 10-15 seconds the instructions said… when it was done it was about 5 minutes later and the liquid was black…. which indicates Boy.

However, I we felt that those results might be off because they said the reaction would only take a few seconds when it took much longer. I found another website that said “If the mixture darkens to a brownish color within the first 10 seconds – It is a boy. If there is no darkening or color change after 10 – 15 seconds – It is a girl.” Since it took a little bit for the color to change that would mean Girl.

And lastly two lists…

It’s a Boy if:

• You are carrying low- no 
• You are craving salty or sour foods -no
• You are craving protein – meats and cheese-no
• Your feet are colder than they were before pregnancy-no
• The hair on your legs has grown faster during pregnancy -no
• Your hands are very dry -no
• Your pillow faces north when you sleep-no
• Dad-to-be is gaining weight, right along with you-no
• Pregnancy has you looking better than ever -don’t know
• Your urine is bright yellow in color -don’t know
• Your nose is spreading -no 
• You are having headaches -less than before, so no
• You add your age at the time of conception and the number for the month you conceived and the sum is an even number -no 33
• You didn’t experience morning sickness in early pregnancy -yes
• Your baby’s heart rate is less than 140 beats per minute -no
• You are carrying the extra weight out front -yes
• Your belly looks like a basketball -yes
• Your areolas have darkened considerably-no

It’s a Girl if:

• You are carrying high -yes
• Your belly looks like a watermelon-no
• You are craving sweets -yes
• You are craving fruit -yes
• You crave orange juice -yes
• You don’t look quite as good as normal during pregnancy- don’t know 
• You are moodier than usual during pregnancy -no
• Your face breaks out more than usual -no
• You refuse to eat the heel of a loaf of bread-no
• Your breasts have really blossomed! -no
• Your pillow faces south when you sleep -yes
• Your urine is a dull yellow color -don’t know 
• You add your age at the time of conception and the number for the month you conceived and the sum is an odd number -yes 33
• You had morning sickness early in pregnancy- no 
• Your baby’s heart rate is at least 140 beats per minute- yes 
• You are carrying the weight in your hips and rear -no
• Your left breast is larger than your right breast -no
• Your hair develops red highlights – don’t think so

There are lots of other crazy tests involving licking pennies or waiting to see which color flower will die first… but I haven’t gotten around to those yet… probably will not.

The only other “test” is women’s intuition. I steadfastly refused to guess during the first trimester. The first time we saw the sonogram I just blurted out “Oh, there she is!” And I’ve had four or five dreams in which the baby was a girl… not sure if that counts but whenever I slip I say she.

Another “test” I’ve heard is that Daddy always knows… Steve thought the baby was a girl until about 7 months and then he changed his vote to boy.

Either way we will be thrilled and I can’t wait to see his/her face 🙂 I had a dream that we were so excited to see Baby that we forgot to even check the gender!

The sweet smell of baby

Every since we knew we were expecting our little miracle we have both found ourselves stepping into the nursery and just being. I am happy to report that it is a peaceful little room full of promise and good feelings, even more so as it becomes more and more ready for Baby. The light streams in beautifully in the afternoon and seems to make everything glow. In the early morning or depth of the night it is a cool quiet place that seems to stop time.

I know I’m not the first expecting mother to stand in the nursery and just tear up imaging placing our Baby in the crib or cuddling on the couch with him or her.

My point is that we know Baby is coming… it might have felt unreal at first but we’ve seen the sonogram, we’ve laughed as we watched my belly bouncing around, we marveled at how Baby responded to Daddy’s teasing, and I’ve certainly felt the pain of a badly placed foot. But every once in a while it still just hits you with surprise that something so miraculous could be true.

Yesterday I was setting up what will be our diaper station. We did not buy a changing table but rather decided to use a little nook in our house where the previous owners built a cabinent and countertop. Not sure as to why the countertop was deemed necessary but it has always seemed like a changing location and we’ve been calling it the changing station since we moved in (pictures to come).

So I moved the decorative bowl that was there and folded up the tapestry placemat and began unpacking the little diaper caddy we have. I put the Baby oil and lotion in there, the diaper rash cream, the toys that are designated for diaper changes and finally popped open one of the many bags of diapers we’ve been given.

And there it was…. Baby smell.

I’ve babysat enough to know the intoxicating smell of a new baby, especially a new baby freshly changed.

But this was different… it was the smell for MY Baby. My baby that will wear this impossibly tiny diapers at this very station, changed by either Steve or me. I just started laughing at the inexplicable miracle of what we are about to have. We are going to have a Baby! It’s not like I just realized it is just that the fact just hit me again… how huge, how amazing, how life changing…. how perfect.

I stood there for a good minute just laughing and smiling …. just can’t wait!

It’s 4 am I must be… up

Can’t really complain about it too much yet but this week seems to have brough on a bit of the insomnia I’ve heard affects pregnant women.

From what I’ve heard of friends experience I’m quite lucky. I know some girls who have been suffering with this since the beginning or in the last trimester have been up for several hours every night. A few have minimally simply had a hard time turning over or been battling multiple bathroom trips.

I have been good… mostly waking up for a moment or two once or twice a night and going right back to sleep. Turning over is still fairly simple and my bathroom breaks are at most once every few nights. But Monday night I woke up at 4 am for a potty break (my usual time) and just could not go back to sleep. Starting thinking about things Steve and I should talk about or decide on. Thought about the reorganization project I have been doing in the house and how behind I am. Wondering if we have enough onsies or too many. Remembering that I haven’t touched my novel in nearly a year and I’d like to get that done. Worrying about money. The whole thing. So after about 45 minutes I decided to get up and clean.

Steve found me in the pink bathroom at 6 am cleaning out cabinents to make room for baby supplies. He laughed. I laughed. I was tired enough that I was able to go back to bed after he went to work and slept a few more hours.

The next few nights I was fine, slept straight through…not even turning over. Tonight here I am again… but instead of cleaning I decided to catch up on the blogging.

Steve asked if it was the Baby waking me up… the Baby is definitely awake and performing some type of interpretive dance in there but I don’t think it’s enough to keep me awake. Not even sure if it’s enough to have woken me up…. but 4 am definitely seems to be the magic hour.

So in the meantime I’ll sit here and type, or finish up those bathroom cabinents. In 7 weeks or so I’ll most definitely have someone keeping me company at this hour and that will be a plus!